For better AND worse, we learn from our mothers. However imperfect she may have been, your mother taught you lessons– some valuable and to be treasured, and some that presented you with challenges – challenges that strengthened you or those you’ve yet to rise above.
My mom was a classy woman, a lady. She was smart. She was pretty. She had an elegance and grace to her.
She also hid wine in the cedar chest, drank while we were at school, and zoned out most nights. She grew up in a family with a lot of drinking, so not surprisingly, she, too, turned to “the drink.”
In life, my mother seemed aloof, not a particularly loving or demonstrative woman, certainly not the nurturing mom my sensitive nature yearned for. Our connection was definitely strained. Today, I believe she was actually an extremely sensitive woman who found life so hard that she shut down early on.
Mom was only 67 when she died. Way too young. This year as Mother’s Day approaches, I wish I could have a little more time with her. I wish I could tell her, face to face, how much I appreciated her and what she gave me; how much I appreciate her struggles – the ones I knew of, and the ones I’ve realized since she passed. I wish I could hug her (as much as she’d let me) and tell her I love her.
A love note to Mom this Mother’s Day –
Thank you for the gift of holding myself “like a lady,” for appreciating beauty and simple elegance. Thank you for helping me appreciate intelligence over looks – and honoring
the blessings of both!
Having seen your challenges, and dealing with my own, I’ve learned how much I want and need a relationship with my God, because the foundation I tried to build for myself was pretty unstable and had a lot of cracks in it. I’ve learned that admitting my vulnerability actually serves me and that alcohol doesn’t. I’ve learned that even though I’ve been told I’m not good enough or that I’m not going to “make it,” if I keep trying instead of giving up, I will make substantial progress.
Gifts and Challenges
What were some of the gifts your mom did give you? What are some of the challenges you faced having a “less than perfect” mom raise you – and how has living through those challenges strengthened you? Which challenges continue to frustrate you? Today’s a great day to celebrate your mother – and to celebrate YOU!