If life doesn’t seem to be going so well, it might be time to re-shuffle your deck of cards – and stack the deck for your benefit.
A while back I was griping a bit with my coach who suggested that I really COULD stack the deck in my own favor. I could do WHAT? “Choose to stack the deck in your own favor,” she repeated. “You could make sure some good cards are in the deck and see the good cards that are there in your life way more often.”
At first, stacking the deck sounded a little like cheating to me! But, really, it was a way to guarantee my success, my joy, my prosperity – and no one else was going to lose the game.
And it could start with some very simple things!
When one of my clients was stuck in a miserable rut, we realized she had a habit that wasn’t serving her. Her deck was stacked against her. When she tried something new and was successful, she used to tell me, “Oh, that’s no big deal.” Maura kept hearing her mother’s voice minimizing her accomplishments, time and time again. And she, unconsciously, continued the practice on her own – stacking the deck against herself.
By beginning to acknowledge simple wins and becoming aware that saying “no big deal” sabotaged her, she began to appreciate her successes – and find more and more of them in her life. Suddenly, her life was taking on a new perspective.
Stack the deck in your favor
How do you stack the deck in your favor?
First – realize you’ve probably been using a rulebook that tells you what you can or can’t acknowledge yourself for. Usually, you aren’t supposed to take credit for the “no big deals.” So, it’s time to get rid of that outdated rulebook!
Then, create a new rulebook for what deserves to be acknowledged. Start simple. Include the “no big deals.” You’ll be surprised at how happy you’ll begin to feel when you acknowledge yourself for those simple things. (It may feel silly or uncomfortable at first, but keep going. Your inner 6 year old is HUNGRY for the positive attention it didn’t get all those years ago!)
Give yourself kudos for doing everything that stretches you, anything you do that feels like an esteemable action. Even if you don’t ace the task, give yourself credit for trying. It’s like slipping an extra couple aces into your deck!